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Yep...I think I might tell one of my friends.

Discussion in 'Lesbian' started by Threshold25, Oct 22, 2018.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Threshold25
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    Threshold25 Hot Cookie
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    So there it is. Like the title says, I'm really thinking about telling one specific friend about me being attracted to women.

    Why ? I don't know. I just feel like I need at least one close friend to know so I can talk about it with someone that knows me. Plus, I'm really worried that I might end up alone. I don't know where to start when It comes to dating woman. I have no idea how to meet other lesbians. Im not a fan of clubs or bars so that's a problem.

    I guess I'm hoping that by telling my friend she will help me get in the dating world (even if she's not gay).

    Also, I am soooooo tired of talking about boys. My friends are always talking about how they want a man bla bla bla. I would like to talk about girls -_- .

    I swear being gay is the loneliest place on earth.

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  2. Lexx

    Lexx Lurker

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    I wish you the best of luck! When I told my closest friend about liking women, she was okay with it. She still talks about boys and her relationships so that hasn't really changed. But it's nice to have someone knowing because it's such a big deal if you're not out to your family or other friends.

    I'm here if you need a friend or someone to talk to.

    -L
     
  3. Threshold25
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    Thank you for this message !! Unfortunately, I didnt find the strength to tell my friend. I wanted to, but I just couldn't. I got scared that it might change the dynamic between my friend and me.
    I think I'll just wait for the right moment.

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  4. JellyBear

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    I remember this stress when i came out to my first friend and then every close friend after that and as much as i hated it, i almost wish i could go back to it and do it 'my way'. If i was able to come out all over again, i'd just send everyone Ally Hills' video 'Coming Out song'.

    Don't rush yourself and think of how you want to do it.

    Good luck, whenever you're able to do it, i hope it goes well.
     
  5. Threshold25
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    I like the idea of playin a song to let my friends know lol. If I could do it my way....I'd just show up to one of my friend gatherings with my girlfriend and be like yep it is what it is. To me thats the perfect scenario.

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  6. CaliGirl27

    CaliGirl27 Lurker

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    The best is yet to come my love! Come out to your trusted friends at your own pace. <3 Sending you lots of love
     
  7. Threshold25
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    Thanks !!! This made me smile :D 

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  8. KunLunMaster

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    Telling a few of my friends has helped me feel less alone. I am lucky that most of my friends are supportive no mater my sexual orientation.
     
  9. chefboyardeeravioli
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    Do it! It is so much better... It is also a lot easier on your mental health, as once you start openly speaking about your feelings things fall into place/make more sense.
    About your concern with finding other lesbians, I had that concern too, but somehow... you just kinda end up with em'. I don't know if it's like a subconscious thing ... but you'll find that, even in the closet, once you're out to yourself, other lgbtq+ people will find you. I don't look especially "gay", but somehow, within a month of being at a new school or work environment, I'm at the "gay table". Maybe I'm just very lucky, but I know that once I came out (to even one person) things became a lot easier.
    Try using the app "her", even if you are just looking for other women into women, you can make friends on there.
    --- Double Post Merged, Nov 9, 2018 ---
    Do it! It is so much better... It is also a lot easier on your mental health, as once you start openly speaking about your feelings things fall into place/make more sense.
    About your concern with finding other lesbians, I had that concern too, but somehow... you just kinda end up with em'. I don't know if it's like a subconscious thing ... but you'll find that, even in the closet, once you're out to yourself, other lgbtq+ people will find you. I don't look especially "gay", but somehow, within a month of being at a new school or work environment, I'm at the "gay table". Maybe I'm just very lucky, but I know that once I came out (to even one person) things became a lot easier.
    Try using the app "her", even if you are just looking for other women into women, you can make friends on there.
     
  10. Threshold25
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    Hey, the HER app seems to be what I need right now, but I would have to be completly "out". Not sure if I can handle being really out at the moment...but I know thatbyou are right....I feel lile living a double life and it suuuckkss.

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  11. Threshold25
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    I hope my friends will be as supportive as your friends. For now, im kinda screening my friends to see who wont reject me or see me differently.

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  12. KunLunMaster

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    That makes sense. I generally only come out to people who I have already heard say gay positive things. Except for my family. They kind of know I was attracted to my best friend in the past. But I haven’t talked to them about anything recently.
     

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