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Would you make love to your cousin?

Discussion in 'Gay' started by MichaelJames, May 20, 2018.  |  Print Topic

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  1. MichaelJames

    MichaelJames Lurker

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    I guess I’ll start with a bit of a background. My cousin is the son of my aunt, my father’s sister, now he’s 18 and I’m 18. We spent a lot of time together when we were children because our families lived very close each to other. We were great friends and then his family moved to live in another country because his father found a good job there. I remember I was very sad and upset when he left. I know my parents mailed letters and talked to them over the phone, but that was all the grown-up stuff. Mine and his contact were cut completely, and I also had many other things to do, like school and basketball, and soon I didn’t have time to think about him at all and I was already used to the thought that I’ll never see my cousin again.

    However, somewhere in the late spring my aunt called and told that they would like to visit us for the summer. I was super excited to finally meet my cousin. So they arrived a few weeks ago and I almost didn’t recognize my cousin at all. I hadn’t seen him for some ten years or even more and I was amazed to see what a hot guy he has turned into. He was happy to see me as well and we spend days talking and talking each to other about everything that has happened in our lives. It turned out that we were both waiting for the other to start the communication first and since I didn’t write to him all these years he thought I didn’t want to contact him. I felt so connected with him like I’ve never felt with any other person.

    Now about what happened between us. He moved into my room, we have to share a room, because our house isn’t that big. And so one evening he was looking around in my room and he found my gay porn magazine, I bought one as soon as I was sure that men turn me on. He asked me if I liked men, I said yes and after a while, he said: „me too”. We’re both closeted and both afraid our families won’t accept us. Later that night he kissed me on the lips. It felt good and at the same time, it didn't because I thought we mustn't do such things. I know I like him as a guy, but that's so wrong as we're relatives. He says that it's nothing, we're just cousins, not brothers, so we're not related that close. Every night when we lock the doors of my room, he wants to be a lot closer to me than he should and I know I want it too, but all the time I think about how bad this is. I know that there are many places where heterosexual cousin couples are allowed to marry, etc, but for me, it seems strange. Maybe we're not close relatives, but we're still relatives.

    I was so glad to meet him, but now I feel really bad. We have this whole summer in front of us and I wish he wasn't my cousin, but just some hot guy to fall in love with. I know that if we would have grown up together I probably wouldn't look at him this way. I guess it's the time and distance between us that made me forget that we're related and that I mustn't ever make love to him. Besides, maybe it's not a good idea at all to become attached to him, because he'll go away again once the summer will be over. What should I do? Or I guess my real question is - how to stop wanting something you can never have?
     
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  2. Crism
    Dreaming

    Crism Hot Cookie
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    I can agree with your cousin that,being brothers is one thing...Being cousins is another story..I had a funny chapter of my life when i had relations with my cousin without even me knowing that im dating a cousin that i never met before in life, didn't end well tho :/ All i can say to you is listen to your heart! You are both 18, you are both very wise, you can bring decisions on your own.Love dosen't have a Limit :] Even after he leaves, you can always contact em to check em What's up,some other time im pretty sure u will visit him too! Life is a long journey :]
     
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  3. mask1985
    WTF

    mask1985 Shy bi guy
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    OK a lot of things going on here. As far as I am aware sexual relationships between cousins are perfectly legal, at least that is the case here in the UK and you are both over the age of consent so no worries there.

    Now to the more important bits - I and many other people have no issues with this kind of relationship at all but some people as you probably know are somewhat prejudiced and think differently. However it not their opinions that matter although if you are worried about your safety if you think your parents may not approve then it would be wise to keep everything secret from them for now. Don't risk being made homeless.

    What matters is your own happiness and how you feel about your cousin, not so much what society may have conditioned you into believing is correct. Are you looking for something long-term or just a sexual release every so often? But your final question implies that you have almost decided that there is no chance of a relationship developing properly as he will be going home and I wouldn't necessarily think this to be the case. Sure long distance relationships can be difficult but so can short distance ones, there's no guarantees sadly.

    If it was me in your shoes I would have a long think about exactly how I felt about him, ignoring society expectations and how you "think" you should feel. If you let him go would you always wonder what might have been, because that is not a good feeling? Talk to him about what you both want and take it from there.

    As for stopping wanting something you can't have, the answer is a mixture of time, patience and finding somebody else who will make you forget all about him and there is no magic formula for how this will happen. It may be a cliche but people generally only regret the things that they didn't do...

    Hope this helps you a bit - I am sure other people here can offer insight too.
     
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  4. Being.
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    Being. "Everywhere I roam is home"
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    I actually had a crush on my cousin, kissed him on the cheek as a "joke" the week before he got married
     
  5. mask1985
    WTF

    mask1985 Shy bi guy
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    You just can't be trusted Being. :) 
     
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  6. Being.
    Sarcastic

    Being. "Everywhere I roam is home"
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    Lol, * blushes* tried my hardest to get with him over the years, that's the closest I got.
    Wasn't just me trying to get him either.
     
  7. angel70
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    angel70 The Old Guy
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    Interestingly, he's your cross-cousin, and cross-cousins (of opposite sexes) are encouraged to marry in a great many cultures.

    A cross-cousin is the child of your father's sister or your mother's brother. Your father's brother's kids and you mother's sister's kids are called your parallel cousins. I won't go into the anthropological explanation of why cross-cousin marriage is okay and parallel cousin marriage is incest, since none of it apples to same-sex relationships anyway. If it did, though, you'd be totally cool.

    [​IMG]
    This map shows US states where you and your first cousin could get married, and where you can't. Blue means allowed, red means not allowed, and brown means "criminal offense."
     
    #7 angel70, May 20, 2018
    Last edited: May 20, 2018
  8. Twocky61

    Twocky61 Great Learner
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    I'm already in a relationship with a cousin

    Totally different to a sibling as a sibling would be incest
     
  9. Spob
    Apelike

    Spob Expert Homosexual
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    I would not in any case. Regret really sticks when it’s something you can’t undo.

    Search for love on the journey you’ve just begun in life.
     
  10. Barefoot
    Horny

    Barefoot Casual Observer
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    I would do it if I wanted to. Definitely. Just look at my long posted status: "If it was socially acceptable I'd probably be bored with it." Love is love. Follow your heart, and your cousin. It's your life, not other peoples. Be happy. Life is shorter than you think. Just be prepared for how your family will react, but I never let mine live my life and I'm not about to start now. That's my opinion and how I live my life and always have. When you get old the things you regret most are likely to be the things you didn't do.
     
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  11. BiGenderfluid
    Feminine

    BiGenderfluid Great Learner
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    Well first off your both adults and could potentially stick together if you both wanted to. Not sure of laws in your country on this close of a relationship between cousins but the main reason why its just about not allowed or looked down upon in most places is mainly because the restriction was set in place to keep to a healthy gene pool of offspring mainly. Your both gay and cant have a child unless you adopt, so the incest issue really isnt an issue because your not going to create a incest child together with high risk of genetic flaws as a result of getting together. I'd say the biggest issue here would probably be if you two together would be something that the family cant accept, it could be very bad and worst off is if your relationship fails then it could be losing a cousin forever.

    Back when I was 16 I visited my grandparents in arizona and got to meet my one cousin who is a female who was 14. I was so attracted to her. We watched MTV together back in 1991 when MTV was MTV and she cuddled up to me on the couch and no one else was around. I had the biggest arousal but felt as if I cant do this she is my cousin, my moms brothers daughter. She started kissing me and grabbed my hand and placed it on her breast, I was like I cant do this because its wrong and what if we have sex and I get you pregnant. She giggled and said we just keep our pants on and feel each other and then I cant get pregnant. I was like OHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH I agree with that, so we had as close to sex as you can have without me entering her at the risk of knocking her up and we both had the greatest time together, when done and both needing a new pair of underwear from soaking ourselves in slippery lust she layed with her back against my chest and her blonde curly hair against my face and I slowly felt her bombshell body under her shirt and played as she had her hand behind her down my pants playing and I never wished that that never happened. I am bisexual and into both males and females and if a male came up to me and made the first move unless he is gross I would just about go all the way with them. I spoke with her after my grandfathers funeral 12 years ago and she whispered in my ear remember when we had cuddle time and I blushed and said YES that was lots of fun. She said lets have more cuddle time later tonight and we did. Just like before pants stay on but hands can go anywhere. When we were done she told me that I needed to visit more often and I laughed and said were both married though and well it doesnt seem like cheating on our spouses because we are family but if we ever got caught can you imagine how bad it would be. She said basically no one will ever know unless you tell cause my lips are sealed. So she said she wants us to remain as occasional cuddle gathering cousins, and if I visit her or she visits me again I dont think I could ever say no to her because it feels so right even though its so wrong to the world around us. She pretty much said that we are cousins with benefits, sort of like friends with benefits but closer.

    So we are kissing cousins close.

    A fantasy of mine though is if her husband was ever into us being kissing cousins and bi, I could have a homosexual fun with him and both of us please her and him but I doubt he would ever go for a guy but just in fantasy thoughts how hot it would be to have a 3 some with her husband as the 3rd because the guy is HOTTTTTTTTTTT. Not going to ever mention it though unless she tells me her husband is bisexual I might then suggest that kind of fun but other than that I am not going to plant that thought into her head because fear of her being suggestive to him about it and if he isnt into that then it would be very bad, especially if she opens up to him about us etc.
     
    #11 BiGenderfluid, May 23, 2018
    Last edited: May 23, 2018
  12. Twocky61

    Twocky61 Great Learner
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    Same here BiGenderFluid; we just cuddle & kiss & fondle too :) 
     
    #12 Twocky61, May 23, 2018
    Last edited: May 23, 2018
  13. flyboy15
    Cheeky

    flyboy15 Invisible
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    Well, unfortunately mine are all girls...so no lol. I have one younger male cousin...but is currently too young haha. But I guess if i had one who was gay, or just curious...i would think about it.
     

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