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Trigger Warning! Mental health check in

Discussion in 'Health - Physical/Mental' started by Bornunderabadsign, Jan 27, 2020.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Bornunderabadsign
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    Bornunderabadsign Non-binary Natural Disaster
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    Thought I would make a thread so we can record our mental health over time. Just say how you are feeling, maybe things that are bothering you ect.

    Today wasn't that great. My depression was acting up today. Add on the fact that I was under the weather and it was just a shit day. I briefly entertained suicidal thoughts. I feel better after talking with my datemate but I still think it will be a long night.

    I hope others are doing better. Feel free to comment, offer support, or post your own person update. We are in this together.
     
  2. TallGrl
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    I'm not doing too well.
    I''m slipping back into behaviours that I know dont help. Not leaving the house, even though I need to buy some food or go to uni. Hell I can't even go cook the food I have because I can't face the idea of seeing people (housemates that are not friends) when I'm like this. And avoiding things like uni work which I really need to do, because otherwise... well i just can't.
    So not as good as I want to be....
    But I'm going tomorrow to uni I have to... so maybe that will help get me out of this.
    I want to cry so badly, but you know, I only do that when I'm falling apart, at the moment I'm just breaking. Maybe tomorrow I'll cry or next month.

    Anyway those pesky thoughts getting in the way of life are annoying. I hope your night wasnt too bad- but I'm sorry that youre struggling. Sounds that datemate is a good person though if they help.
    O' and by the way I love your profile pic- I really like owls- they're up all night, supposedly wise, and were the godness Athena's animal.
     
  3. Bornunderabadsign
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    Bornunderabadsign Non-binary Natural Disaster
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    I know how easy slipping into old habits is. Sometimes you have to force yourself out of the rut which is very hard to do but it looks like you are trying. You are stronger than you know. Sometimes I good cry helps.

    They are great. I picked my avatar to go with the same theme as my datemate. Their avatar is an owl as well.

    I love Athena!
     
  4. TallGrl
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    TallGrl Dedicative Contributor
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    Yeah I know a cry would be good- but I can't - literally, tear up, about to cry- then tell myself to pull myself together and a lot of other comments/insults. The usual for me though.
    Trying- yep, and its not easy or fun and... nevermind- just keep on trying right.

    Someone else! she is awesome.
     
  5. Butterfly88
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    Butterfly88 Has fallen 87 times and stood up 88
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    Bornunderabadsign I love this idea for a thread! I'm sorry to hear your depression has been acting up.

    TallGrl I'm sorry to hear you are struggling. Crying can be therapeutic. Maybe you can try to find a time when nobody is around and just let it all out. If you have roommates, perhaps there is a time when they are not home?

    I have been alright. I've been pretty happy at home, but when I try to leave the house, I tend to have some problems. I have both high-functioning autism and PTSD, so between sensory issues from autism and hypervigilance from PTSD, it can be challenging for me to handle noise that is out in the world. Plus, I keep hearing news about shootings and other crazy things in the world, so that doesn't exactly help me in wanting to get out of my house. I've been trying to force myself to go on short trips to quiet places. So far, I have been mostly successful in the fact that I manage it okay, but I am so stressed through the experience that I don't enjoy it. My goal, for now, is just to be able to handle going out when I really need to, such as going to doctors and other important things like that.
     
  6. Laura2020

    Laura2020 Curious Explorer
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    I feel too much pressure on me at the moment, I feel tired and worthless.
     
  7. TallGrl
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    TallGrl Dedicative Contributor
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    Hugs x
    can we help?
     
  8. Laura2020

    Laura2020 Curious Explorer
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    Thanks, probably just venting will help.

    BTW I opened a thread about what I have going on with my life at the moment.
     
  9. Butterfly88
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    Butterfly88 Has fallen 87 times and stood up 88
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    You certainly aren't worthless. I also replied to your thread.
     
  10. Doc
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    I’ve been having a lot of trouble lately. My life has felt like disaster after disaster the last couple of years. I have enough dysphoria that it consumes my thoughts and makes it difficult to concentrate on teaching. I had to do an extra semester of student teaching because I worked with an awful teacher last semester who had already determined that they were going to fail me so I cut my hours because why have a mental breakdown if I’m going to fail anyway?

    Thankfully, I’m student teaching with a friend of mine now who is even supportive about the gender stuff. But now I’m having issues with the professors being OFFENDED that I have the audacity to teach/coach outside of my teacher’s regular duties even though in one situation I am literally employed by the district to do so. I’ve learned more in those situations so far because often I am the only teacher/adult in charge. I don’t really know how to explain all this as it’s complicated. My whole life is complicated...one disaster after another. There is little to no hope. I just want to be worthy of basic respect from other adults, but I haven’t earned it yet I guess.
     
  11. Butterfly88
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    I'm sorry to hear you are struggling and feel hopeless. Hopefully, over time you will find more people respect you. Not everyone is heartless so you are bound to find the right people eventually. You deserve respect. I hope you find it soon. Thinking of you.
     
  12. TallGrl
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    I'm doing a bit better, I hate doing things but once I'm actually doing them it's okay. Makes sense?
    Now just stressed with amount of work I need to do. But preferable to other feelings right?
     
  13. Butterfly88
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    I thought I'd try to revive this thread. I am doing so-so. Been a tad depressed but not too bad. I finally found a new therapist who I will be seeing in 2 1/2 weeks. I also found an LGBT-friendly interfaith spiritual group that seems promising. I'm so happy to have found it since I have experienced a good amount of homophobia in the past in Christian groups. I'm a Progressive Christian and I consider my faith to be important to me but I don't believe there's anything wrong with being LGBT.

    Anyway, enough about me, how has everyone else been?
     
  14. TallGrl
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    I'm spiralling slightly I think.
    If I'm distracted I'm fine, but if I have one moment empty I feel like I'm going to break, or cry or something. So I'm not leaving any empty moments.

    Anyway, I can't see a problem with having a faith and being lgbtq- so I'm really glad you've found a group that also knows this.

    Also a friend recommended the cake method-- go out buy the ingredients for a cake, talk to someone in the shop e.g. The till person, go home make a cake, and then share it or eat some.
    You've gone out, talked/human contact, made somthing, achieved a goal of making a cake and then have the pleasure of eating some.
    (doesn't quite work if you have all the ingredients at home - look up a more complicated recipe? Or if you don't bake...)

    Its an alright method really (okay she's a genius of sorts) but I've made two cakes in the last few weeks - diet that I'm on - not working!
     
  15. Bornunderabadsign
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    Bornunderabadsign Non-binary Natural Disaster
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    I'm okay. I could definitely be better. In the last few weeks I've had some not so nice thoughts but I think it has been because of the weather. It seems like it is biblical flood times.

    Finding a faith group that is LGBTQ+ friendly is difficult. I hope this group is good Butterfly88

    The cake method sounds neat TallGrl
     
  16. Doc
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    I get severely depressed on the weekends. I have nothing to distract me from all the stuff that has gone wrong in my life and all my needs that go unmet.
     
  17. Butterfly88
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    TallGrl Thanks, so far the faith group is good. The cake method sounds interesting. First time I've heard of it. I may have to try that sometime. Thanks for sharing! I hope this works for you.

    Bornunderabadsign I hope your mood and the weather both improve soon. I blame global warming. Sad but true about the LGBT-friendly faith groups. And thank you, so far so good.

    Doc Sorry to hear you get depressed on weekends. Do you have any hobbies that can help distract you? Maybe draw or play a video game for a little bit? If you draw something you can also share it with us in the Artists and Art forum if you want, but no pressure.
     
  18. MD_Unicorn
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    MD_Unicorn I live on rainbows, dance in the clouds.
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    I must say this is a great thread... I am so sorry you all are having the bad days... I also must agree I am as well. But just think after the storm comes a rainbow. You all are so string and wonderful. Keep thinking positive.
    Hugs,
    MD xx
     
  19. Kricket
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    Kricket Hot Cookie
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    I just noticed this thread -- what a great idea!

    I have been very up and down lately. On one hand, things are actually looking up, at least from a practical perspective, compared to what they've been lately. On the other hand, I'm still lonely, depressed, and feeling trapped, and I just don't see that situation changing any time soon... or ever.

    Today I have also felt particularly tired, with no physical reason that I should be. I slept pretty well last night, and haven't done anything particularly tiring; save battling some mental demons, I suppose.

    Best wishes to all who are struggling.
     
    #19 Kricket, Feb 24, 2020
    Last edited: Feb 24, 2020
  20. CanadianBi
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    CanadianBi Big thoughts in a small package
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    I haven't been on this site in quite a long period of time. Its been an interesting period since ive been on last to say the least, as mentioned on my profile ive come to the conclusion I think im closer to Pan then Bi. And also after quite a period of back and forth doctor stuff i was surprised to learn I have Autism so that was interesting but thats the update so far.
     

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