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maybe I'm just gay

Discussion in 'Gay' started by Frosky, Jul 5, 2018.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Frosky
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    Frosky feels like I have a green shirt rn
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    it's hard to say really, maybe there was pressure to be straight over the years and it kind of had an effect. I don't really want to go into it

    I just think bi does exist for some people and it's not necessarily confused (but then again I'm hella confused in all other aspects of my life, so)
     
  2. Frosky
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    Frosky feels like I have a green shirt rn
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    or could be strongly male-biased, still trying to figure it out. That seems like another bisexual stereotype as well - that if people knew what kinsey scores were they would be assuming everyone bi is a 3
     
  3. mask1985
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    mask1985 Shy bi guy
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    I'm big into boys at the moment but that hasn't always been the case. As long as you feel sexual attraction to boys and girls you're bi, anything else just complicates things unnecessarily.
     
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  4. AliceR
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    AliceR Reliable Advisor
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    Bi doesn't exist for just some people. Half the people in my life are bi and they are the real deal. Definitely not confused.
    You probably know many bisexuals as well. You just don't know they are bi because they are closeted. ;-)

    Many bisexuals prefer one gender over another. So if you prefer men, that's pretty normal.
    But you are correct in that you may also have been hetero-normalized and may actually be gay.
    However, if you feel attraction for women... real attraction and they turn you on, then you are not gay.

    Maybe you are stressing yourself out too much over this.
    Just go with the flow and see where it leads you.

    If you have any questions about bisexuality, please feel free to ask. ;-)
     
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    #4 AliceR, Jul 5, 2018
    Last edited: Jul 5, 2018
  5. angel70
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    angel70 The Old Guy
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    Most bisexuals prefer one sex over the other -- and if your preference for males is strong enough, you're likely to live as a gay man even if you're technically bi. It's still possible, though, that some "perfect" female will come along some day and sweep you off your feet -- but don't hold your breath waiting for that to happen.
     
  6. Frosky
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    yeah actually I might be overthinking it and I am bi, what didn't help is I had an anxiety attack too and I dunno, don't want to go into it. I guess something could happen with a woman too!

    and some guy I knew said he just prefers not to be labeled, so that's kind of cool. That's where I'm at now, I just wanted to say so to close family, and otherwise just not really bring it up in conversation unless it's necessary. Just get some acceptance from family that that's 'me' and they still like me :p 
     
  7. AliceR
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    AliceR Reliable Advisor
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    I understand why you would get an anxiety attack. I would too if I chose to tell my family about me.

    Is your family accepting of LGBT people? Have you told them yet?
    Honestly, it is nobody's business what orientation you are. It only matters to you and the person you choose as a partner. I wish straight society would stop forcing us to label love, honestly. It's exhausting.

    Like angel70 said, you shouldn't wait for a woman to come around.
    The one for you might very well be male.
    What matters is for you to find happiness.

    Hugs!
     
  8. Frosky
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    thanks for the advice, and the thing was maybe I was closer to asexual before I confronted I could be bi, so it's been very confusing and maybe I'll go further into it later
     
  9. Morfar
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    Morfar The eye of the Wolf
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    If you could do only one thing sexually, for the rest of your life, what exactly would it be?
     
  10. GreasyMoose
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    GreasyMoose Well-Known Contributor
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    Can't stress it enough but just go with what makes you comfortable and don't over rationalise everything in complex terms. That's not how sexuality is meant to be :p 
     

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