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Looking for advice

Discussion in 'Bisexual & Pansexual' started by golddust, May 18, 2019.  |  Print Topic

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  1. golddust

    golddust Lurker

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    Hey everyone!

    Thank you for taking the time to read this. I am in my first relationship with a woman after only being with men and being married once. I am completely in love with her and this has been a very life-changing experience for me. I finally feel like I have found the one and I'm so thankful to finally feel myself.
    However, I find myself missing sex with men. Not for a lack of sexual pleasure as the sex with her is great. I just...miss it and find myself having huge desires.
    Anyone been here before? Advice on how to deal with this? I don't feel like I can talk to her about it. She's not bisexual and has confidence issues so I'm afraid it would absolutely crush her. Any help is so appreciated.
    Xoxoxoxo
     
  2. Lyria

    Lyria Foxie-kun

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    I think having an open and honest conversation would be best.
    That's because I tend to try and "protect" my partner's feelings by trying not to hurt him but in reality, he feels useless and unworthy of my trust, like I'm not able to have a conversation with him.
    (I am working on that together with him too, it's scary but it gets better) He's always thankful that I've chosen to tell him something honestly, even if it feels like he'll be devastated by it. In fact, when I mentioned having a huge crush on Zendaya back in 2015 (on topic of bisexuality) he giggled a little (we're a cheery couple!) and was very understanding while I was shaking in fear.

    So what I'm trying to say is, no matter the outcome you may imagine, it's best you talk to her. It doesn't have to be a "I'm telling you that I'll go have sex with a man now" but rather "I'm in this difficult situation and needed to talk to you about it". And who knows, maybe she'd be interested in an open relationship?

    I wish you the best!
     
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  3. mike300

    mike300 Addictive Advisor
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    if u feel like it, then do it..it will be better to talk with her first, she will understand...but if u want to feel the sensation with men again, do it! we all pass phases in life..i dont find any reason to supress it..after all, u were married with a man and u just miss the sensation
     
  4. golddust

    golddust Lurker

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    Thank you both. It's so helpful to get outside opinions. We're very open and honest with each other but I have just been feeling like this topic may be a little too sensitive. Thanks so much for the kind words!!!
     
  5. Larry45
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    Larry45 Amateur bisexual
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    This is a good suggestion, and one I wish my wife agreed with
     
  6. mike300

    mike300 Addictive Advisor
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    mine agrees and most of the time uses dildo inside me and she loves it
     

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