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Is it okay for a friend to say being gay is a choice?

Discussion in 'Gay' started by Harry Matthews, Oct 25, 2018.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Harry Matthews

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    hey guys, I was just wondering on what your opinion/reaction would be if one of your friends said to you that being gay is a choice? What would you do?
     
  2. r3gulator3

    r3gulator3 Dedicative Contributor
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    Ok, so I have a friend who believes that you may be born with the desire but it’s your choice to act on it. Is that what your saying or that it’s completely your choice?

    A lot of Christian folks now a days because of science will say sure your born that way but it’s your choice to act on it. Ok whatever, your beliefs structure doesn’t effect me so we agree to disagree.

    If it’s the latter choice you can try to educate but I doubt it will go far. Most people just don’t want to hear it if they are that convicted. I say if you want to keep your friend and they aren’t badgering you about it, just let it be. Time can possibly change things.


    “Being gay is like glitter, it never goes away.” -Lady Gaga-
     
  3. River W.
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    Just ignore it for now. If it comes up again, either talk to them about it, or just stop being friends with them. Personally, if a friend said that to me, I wouldn't say I didn't want to be friends with them anymore right away. I'd just slowly start hanging around them less and less.
     
  4. angel70
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    Have you asked him why he thinks certain people would choose to be gay? It certainly doesn't make life any easier! You also might ask if he remembers when he chose to be straight. Was he presented with different options and called upon to make a selection? Was it a difficult choice? ;) 
     
  5. Jayme82
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    I would ask them why they feel this way it may not be out of hatred but of ignorance or how thier family raised them so definitely get to the bottom of it
    If they are uneducated on the matter maybe you can educate them but if they are steadfast on its a choice being friends with them very well could be problematic so be prepared not to stay friends with them
    I hope all goes well and you can figure things out
     
  6. Larry45
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    If it was a choice I would be straight. It makes life easier. As all of you know, there is nothing I can do about my sexuality. It’s ok, I’ve embraced it. At least internally
     
  7. Butterfly88
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    You could try asking them when they chose to be straight. May get them to think about how silly that is.
     
  8. mask1985
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    mask1985 Shy bi guy
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    I'd politely show them the error in their thinking and if they still didn't agree we probably wouldn't be friends much longer.
     
  9. zen

    zen Curator, Royal Academy of Inappropriate Handshake
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    You can tell your friend "Only uneducated and arrogant people would jump to such conclusion based on unscientific fake news or meaningless belief or wishful thinking. Unless you've been gay or expert neuroscientist/psychologist, you should stop assuming things you know nothing about."
     
  10. Mosha de Lyon

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    I don't know the details of your situation but I had a friend once who said being gay was a choice. He was Muslim and refused to change his mind. Needless to say we weren't friends much longer after that.
     
  11. Larry45
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    I am actually closer to straight than gay. I think it’s always been that way. My experiences have almost all been with women, but not all. I can’t deny my attractions to guys at times
     
  12. Larry45
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    I can understand that. I’m married so my playing around days have ended. That doesn’t mean I don’t like to look and think about hot people
     
  13. Morfar
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    He will figure it out,,some day.
     
  14. Being.
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    I tried this once.
    And I got told because it's natural.
    At further insistence they said they were born that way.
    So it only proved my point.
    But they didn't like it. Lol.
     
  15. AudryLeigh
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  16. Soheil
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    Ask him what logic/argument he has behind the idea. Is there any strong ground he has?
    And also ask him what's the point? So what?
     

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