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I’m confused

Discussion in 'Questioning & General LGBT' started by Casey_Questioning, May 17, 2019.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Casey_Questioning

    May 17, 2019
    +0 / 0 / -0
    hey, so this is really out of the blue and random but I really needed somewhere to find out what this feeling is.

    So I for a fact know I’m ace, I’ve never really felt that way about people. Romantically, I can Be attracted to anyone regardless of what they identify as. First I thought I was biromantic because I always found interest in males and females (including those who were mtf and ftm) then I started liking someone who was non binary do I thought I was panromantic, I still say I am because it feels right to me.

    However, now I feel strange. I’ve known this person for quite a few years and she’s gender fluid but normally identifies as female so that’s what I normally use. I’ve always liked her and thought she was pretty, we both tried dating but I felt awkward so I put it down as it just wasn’t the right person. However, I still had feelings.

    I left those feelings alone for quite a while until I told this girl about it and we tried again. But still something wasn’t right. This isn’t the only person this has happened with. It also happened with an ex boyfriend who I liked and thought was cute and I was definitely attracted to him. I had liked him for years! Then we started dating and it didn’t feel right.

    It’s like I get these feelings, romantically, for people but then the relationship just doesn’t feel right. I don’t know whether it’s just based on the people I’m dating but it’s strange? I had an ex girlfriend before, who broke up with me, the relationship felt weird yet I had a crush on her? And thought she was pretty? I didn’t even want to think of us breaking up but when she dumped me I didn’t cry or feel upset...I was more relieved.

    I have a crush on this girl, well I think she’s pretty anyway, but I’m just worried that if I tell her that and if we date it will feel the same. All of my relationships have had the same odd feeling about them...and I don’t know why.

    Can someone help me?? I know I’m young and still trying to find out who I am and I know it will take time but can someone maybe try and help point me in the right direction?

    Thanks, Casey.
  2. Luna Wolfe

    Luna Wolfe Greenhorn
    Beloved Member

    Apr 8, 2017
    +13 / 0 / -0
    Hey, sexuality is fluid, so don’t force a label on yourself if you can’t quite figure it out. Perhaps you are in the wrong relationship, or perhaps you and your partners have been seeking out different things.
    Sometimes, our languages of love are different from the ones we love and that’s ok. Give your relationships time and be open with them about what you’re looking for from the relationship.

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