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I think i am.

Discussion in 'Asexual & Grey-Ace' started by Cerie Hinton, Nov 17, 2019.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Cerie Hinton

    Cerie Hinton Hot Cookie
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    I came across a term, demisexual, while reading a book and had to google it and reading up on it. I discovered that demisexual sounds a lot like me and talked to a friend who knows terminolgy and agrees with me. But struggling to get my head around it. I think it the term asexual and applying it myself i am struggling to get my head around as i enjoy sex but have to get to know my partners first. I am also a BDSM Dominant who rarely has penetrative sex with subs.
    I am just confused with all the terms. I know i need to get over my preconseptions of what the terms are.
    Sorry if this does not make sense or offends anyone.
     
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  2. Thespis
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    Thespis Blithe Spirit
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    Hi Cerie,

    Yes, from what you describe, you are a classic Demisexual. I always think it must be a rather useful thing to be, because it means you don't get led into relationship dead-ends by dumb lust. :) 

    P.S.: Nothing you have said could possibly offend anyone.
     
    #2 Thespis, Nov 17, 2019
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  3. Cerie Hinton

    Cerie Hinton Hot Cookie
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    Thank you Thespis. Thinking getting it all out in a fiction book will help. Downside other books will have to wait. But it is always the way. Too many ideas and not enough time.
     
  4. Thespis
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    I'm a writer, too - well, a performance poet to be precise. Too many ideas and not enough time, you say? Can we swap lives for a bit - I'm an empty vessel at the moment! :D 

    Re being demisexual, something I forgot to say: I think it must be very nice for those on the receiving end of your affection, because (assuming they know that you're demi) they can be sure that you were attracted to them as a person first. I often think the human race would be better off if we were all demisexual. There might be less sex going on as a result, but what sex there was would be meaningful sex! :) 
     
  5. Cerie Hinton

    Cerie Hinton Hot Cookie
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    Thank you and it is true i do not give it to anyone and everybody.
     
  6. Dreamsexual
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    Dreamsexual Reliable Contributor
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    Hello Cerie :) 
    Demisexuality is cool and valid and wonderful.

    Terminology is always imprecise and debateable - but who you are isn't. You are you, regardless of anyone else's semantic issues.
     
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  7. Cerie Hinton

    Cerie Hinton Hot Cookie
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    Thank you Dreamsexual.
     
  8. BiBiLife
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    BiBiLife Forever in debt to your priceless advice.
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    Hi Cerie,

    This is almost precisely the definition of demisexual. By contrast, a person who is asexual never experiences sexual feelings. Demisexual and asexual people may have any romantic orientation.
     
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  9. Cerie Hinton

    Cerie Hinton Hot Cookie
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    Thank you. BiBiLiFe.
     

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