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I need help coming out..

Discussion in 'Transgender' started by Ainsley, Jan 16, 2021.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Ainsley
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    Ainsley Lurker

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    Hi... a little background I'm a 13 year old trans guy and im very dysphoric almost all the time... I realized I was trans about a year ago... a while ago I came out to my mother and she doesn't not accept me at all... basically I had to convince her I would just stop being trans somehow to avoid being kicked out of my house... I came out to one of my teachers and some of my closest friends... one of these friends is going back to school in person on Monday... she uses my name and pronouns and so will this other teacher... I'm sure it won't be long before everyone else at school finds out... the one teacher I'm out to tested the waters with all my other teachers and they were all supportive so thats not what I'm worried about... first off, I don't know how other students will react... I don't want to get bullied or lose any friends or have any of them out me to my family which leads me to my next point... my little sister goes to my school and she might find out eventually... she is lgbtq herself and one of her friends is bigender so she might understand... but she often shares things that she shouldnt... she seems very naive of my mothers opinions and im worried it is going to get her or me hurt if she decides to tell her... I'm also worried word will get around somehow to my mom... I don't know I might just be screwed but if anyone has any kind of advice that would help a lot...
     
  2. HiImNathan
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    HiImNathan Greenhorn

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    Hey Ainsley.

    There's not a lot of people on here that are close to our age. I will try to give as much advice as I can. my mom didn't accept me at all either so we have that in common. First off make sure you have the right friends before coming out, and if you're being almost forced out as it seems by friends to your family then you need to tell them how you feel about that. I too was worried about how friends and people at school would react (tho not everyone knows) but my friends were very supportive and if they aren't then drop them it doesn't matter what they think.

    overall I think you need to be ready to come out to everyone when coming out to friends and close people.
    the word can spread.
     
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  3. Takusprite
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    Takusprite Bi, genderfluid, and still figuring this out.
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    Hi, the most important thing to consider is your own personal physical safety. If there is a possibility of your parents throwing you out of your house, then I would wait on coming out until you either are able to live on your own or if you have a backup plan including a place to stay if you can't go home.

    Second, if you're worried about the news spreading throughout your school, tell that to your teacher(s) and your friends who you are out to. Tell them to not use male pronouns at school because your safety is at risk for now.

    And if you and your sister are close, she might be old enough to understand and to keep a secret from your mom. But I wouldn't tell her until you're more ready to come out to your parents again, just in case.

    Good luck.
     

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