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I just... Got....

Discussion in 'Gay' started by Being., Oct 1, 2018.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Being.
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    Being. "Save me from the nothing I've become"
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    So. I um. I met a guy from grindr and... Well. Uh. He didn't match his picture and um... Yeah. And so... I went with him anyway against my better judgement. And so we did things and... He made it all about him and... I don't think he used a condom, and I've been trying to clean myself out for ages because it's smelly and now I'm worried I'll have a sti and he didn't even let me finish.
    I.... I don't know. I'm just shaking.
    Help me.
     
  2. Being.
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    Being. "Save me from the nothing I've become"
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    Jayme82 help me. I'm so scared.
     
  3. Barefoot
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  4. Jayme82
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    Are you you ok he didn't force himself on you did he?
    You need to go to the nearest health clinic and be checked out I hope it's nothing but you never know I had a similar scare when I was young and dumb and had to get tested it is scary and nerve racking but luckily I was clean but as scary as it will be it's better to know than not know they have treatments for everything nowadays so please go and be safer in the future
    Big hug bro
     
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  5. AudryLeigh
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    Hey Being,

    Take a few deep breaths. The chances of having picked up anything serious from one encounter are very, very slim. Unfortunately, a test won't yield meaningful results for 6 months, and you should be checked again in a year but again, the chances of having picked up anything serious from a one time encounter are extremely thin.

    Our better judgement is usually our gut instincts talking to us -- you should always listen, always.

    The only thing you're going to find on grinder is sex -- meaningless and often perverted sex. What you really need is love. What you really deserve is love. You can't push the river. The way you find love is to be your best, most authentic self, and let people get to know you. You are such a good person, and that shows here, but I feel like in real life you try too hard, and may even seem desperate. You are a good looking guy -- really, you are. But if you try too hard, it's going to mask who you really are. You can't make it happen, you have to let it happen -- you cannot push the river.

    Again, take a few deep breaths, don't beat yourself up, we all make mistakes. Our bodies are very good at cleaning themselves out -- very soon you're going to be all clean and pristine again. What you do with stuff like this is, you learn what you can from them, and then you let them go so they can fade into the past, where they belong.

    With hugs and all the love in my heart,
    Audry Leigh
     
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  6. Being.
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    Being. "Save me from the nothing I've become"
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    I am going to order a at home test kit that I can use if I'm still here in 6 months.
    Honestly I'm the stupidest person ever.
     
  7. AudryLeigh
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    You're not. I made a similar mistake when I was your age, and ended up getting myself raped. I also made a similar mistake about 12 years ago, in which I definitely was thoroughly exposed to hiv/aids. I lived through both or those, and I have them both securely in the past, where they belong. Life is about the future -- don't let yourself live in the past. Tomorrow is the first day of the rest of your life.

    Hugs, and all the love in my heart,
    Audry Leigh
     
  8. Being.
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    It's strange. This whole experience had made me kinda wanna live just to piss everyone off and shove it in all the haters faces.
     
  9. AudryLeigh
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    You don't want to let anger rule your life. It's not who you are. I know after something like this, you really feel like you need to DO something -- you just want to power the whole experience out of your reality. We can't let things like this change us. It happened. It's over. I know it's not over in your mind yet, but really, it's over. Learn what you can from it, and then banish it to the past, which really is where it belongs. Really, when something shakes up our lives like this, it's an opportunity to come out the other side a better person. You're not damaged. You certainly took some hard hits to your confidence, self image, sense of worth, your faith in humanity, your sense of security, but really, you're the same wonderful, beautiful person you've always been. Don't let this change you. Learn what you can from it, and let it go -- let it go into the past where it belongs.

    With lots of nice big warm fuzzy hugs, and all the love in my heart,
    Audry Leigh
     
  10. illuminati001
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    Hey! Its alright dont worry! The best thing you need to do rn is take PEP and take it for a month. As for STIs did you notice any bumps or anything of that sort anywhere? STIs have a bad rep but most of them can be cured or vaccined. Just make sure after this if you are not vaccined you get vaccined for STIs for which the vaccines are available. The chances are low that you will get something serious from the encounter and most likely it will all be fine. Test yourself after a month and always use condoms. Dont test yourself for herpes. Grindr is unsafe use a different app and just in general be careful. I know about sexual frustration and it sucks yes but safety first. If you live in a well known city you could also invite the sexual encounter to a gay bathhouse which is pretty safe imo.
     
  11. Being.
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    AudryLeigh

    I just told my mum. I told her everything. About the past 13 years. What's life's been like for me. How they've made me feel.
    I finally got it all out.
     
  12. AudryLeigh
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    How did that go? Well, I hope.
    That has to feel good. That's a load that you've been carrying for a long time.

    Being, I am so proud of you. That was a big step, and must have taken some real courage. The more out you are, the easier it will be to live life as your true authentic self. I think it's wonderful that you were able to tell your mum. That was a very positive thing that you did, and I hope it leads to even more good things. I really am so very proud of you and so happy that you were finally able to get it all out.

    I hope you can keep in touch -- I really want to know how things are going for you, because I really do care about you. If you do lose your Internet, maybe we can find another way to stay in touch. Around here, every coffee shop, every fast food place, every bar and restaurant all have public WiFi. I know it's a pain, but I had to do it for quite a while at one point. It's a pain, but at least it's a way to keep in touch with people.

    With lots of nice, big, warm, fuzzy hugs, and all the love in my heart,
    Audry Leigh
     
  13. mask1985
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    mask1985 Shy bi guy
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    That's an important and massive step taken and I hope it's a turning point for better things for you.
     
  14. Being.
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    This isn't what all sex is like is it?
     
  15. Jayme82
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    No it's not
     
  16. Thief King Bakura
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    Thief King Bakura ☆ Start.the.GaMe.of.DaRkNess ✩
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    Being, I'm very sorry for what has happened to you. Please know that you're among family here as well. You will find somebody who will treat you right. You deserve somepony that will treat you like a king. You're awesome. Proud of you for telling us about it, if you ever need to talk about anything, my virtual door is always open. :) 
     
  17. mask1985
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    mask1985 Shy bi guy
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    Absolutely not, but it's pretty standard for sex with randoms, and virtually everyone has had sexual experiences they would rather forget, I know I have on more than one occasion, it's part of life.

    You will find someone good at some point because they are out there, it just takes time and patience and a thick skin to deal with the assholes. And when that day comes do whatever it takes to keep hold of them.
     
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