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Asexual I am asexual or heterosexual?

Discussion in 'Asexual & Grey-Ace' started by Jitteringfeeling, Jun 20, 2019.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Jitteringfeeling

    Jitteringfeeling Im confused

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    Hellow. As any 18 year old woman who is still confused about her sexuality I concluded that I had to come here searching for different opinions or answers to those who can help.

    I´ll be straight...(maybe(?) I have dbouts about if Im heterosexual or asexual. That´s because I actually feel attracted to 2D animated characters but I dont think I feel the same towards 3D characters or actors. However lately I been unsure about this. I don´t remember liking anyone but it could et to happen someday?
    My dbouts come principally from the context of my life. You see, I have mild aspergers syndrome and that made me pretty asocial in my early chldhood and adolecense and just reciently I been interacting more whit pepole and making more friends so this could mean I just need to search a little more to find a guy I feel something for. This fact, however, is double sided as I have found that pepole on the spectrum tend to be not heterosexual but nothing is confirmed yet.

    Most of my friends said that I could have had too high standards but I think it´s weird. Even if I was being too strict whit a possible partner, the fact that I can´t get to be attracted for an actor from a movie or even a 3D character is weird. But If you think it codly a "I like just 2D characters" is ridiculous from a biologycall perspective even if psychologically could have some sense and I am aware of pepole attracted to weird things so is possible. As well as i know that we can´t change this things as far as I know so OOFF

    Or maybe Im just hetero and Im reading too much into it. Or maybe I need psychologycall help. What do you think guys, Im going crazy or not?
     
  2. BiBiLife
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    BiBiLife Forever in debt to your priceless advice.
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    It's quite normal to question your identity. You will likely figure it out with time.
     
  3. nobodie
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    nobodie Drowning
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    There is nothing crazy about what you are saying. Some people are attracted to different, non-normative things like animals or bondage. This doesn't mean that you are asexual, homosexual, heterosexual or any other sexual. This just means that you connect on a different level and have not found that in the world yet. Being on the spectrum doesn't mean that you can't have that connection. My best friend also has Asperger, yet he has had several thriving relationships. There may or may not be someone out there for you. The only thing you can do is wait and see.
     
  4. Jitteringfeeling

    Jitteringfeeling Im confused

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    OH SORRY FOR THAT. I didn´t mean to sound like all pepole on the spectrum feel like that. I just meant It can happen more often on them by what I saw. Didnt mean to offend you or your friend :,). And for the rest well I guess you are right but it´s scary to not understeand that, you know? What if I have a relationship whit someone, lets say a girl, in a romantic way and then relize I like the other gender? Its exahusting to think about. Sorry to vent on ya. You helped to calm me down at least. Thnaks for it
    --- Double Post Merged, Jun 20, 2019 ---
    :,) yeah. I guess Ill have to try and see
     
  5. nobodie
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    nobodie Drowning
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    Don't worry about it. You neither offended me nor my friend. I was trying to let you know that there are people on the spectrum that are able to have meaningful relationships. If you do fall for one and then the other, so be it. There is no rule, or at least we are trying to make it so there is no rule, that says you must pick one and keep it for the rest of your life.
     
  6. Jitteringfeeling

    Jitteringfeeling Im confused

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    Ah thats good then and yes, pepole whit autism or asperger or anything on the spectrum can be pretty socal and happy and sexual, I know. Also whit that question I meant that: "what would happen if I started a relationship whit a girl romantically, regardless of the fact that I was not attracted to her (because I would never like anyone that way anyways wich is a thing that asexuals do) but then, I relize I actually like boys that way? :(  that could be a complete desaster but...yeahh you can´t answer that. Just I can I guess .w .Uu
     
  7. Bornunderabadsign
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    Bornunderabadsign Transfeminine Natural Disaster
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    I have never been diagnosed with autism of any kind but I believe that I may be on the spectrum or maybe not. I don't know. I have known a few people that were either autistic or aspies. I don't know if you have had time or the right situation yet to know for sure if you are heterosexual or bisexual or homosexual or any kind of sexual. Even if you you had I would still caution against settling into any one group until you have really examined your feelings and thoughts. It is possible that you are one or the other. I think you may asexual but even asexuals can enjoy sex they just don't want or need it or something like that. I'm demisexual, and I can have arousal and can enjoy masturbation but it is more blowing off steam than any thing "special" even when I have been with people I was much more into making sure they felt good than any real need for sexual release on my part. If that makes sense.

    My question to you is are you romantically attracted to anyone or have you in the past. No, 2D characters don't count. Could you see yourself being in a relationship with anyone even if it an imaginary or future someone?

    I think many of us at one time or another had a crush on 2D characters. If there weren't then there wouldn't be so many self-insert fanfictions or fan arts. I've been attracted to cartoon and anime characters myself.

    Although I'm out of touch with him I was pretty good friends with a guy on the spectrum that had a boyfriend. Both of them were really big into My Little Pony Friendship is Magic. The guy in question had the biggest crush on Braeburn and Big Mac from the show. He was a self proclaimed asexual but he did have relations with his boyfriend to make his boyfriend happy.

    That doesn't mean that people in relationships with people that are asexual have sex it is totally up to them to decide what they do in the context of the relationship. Some Asexuals like to be involved with the opposite sex and are heteroromantic. Others prefer to be with the same sex and are homoromantic. Some like both and are biromantic. Then you have people like me that can have a romantic relationship with any gender and are panromantic. There are other types of romantics even people that are aromantic and arn't interested in romantic relationships at all.
    --- Double Post Merged, Jun 20, 2019 ---
    I have never been diagnosed with autism of any kind but I believe that I may be on the spectrum or maybe not. I don't know. I have known a few people that were either autistic or aspies. I don't know if you have had time or the right situation yet to know for sure if you are heterosexual or bisexual or homosexual or any kind of sexual. Even if you you had I would still caution against settling into any one group until you have really examined your feelings and thoughts. It is possible that you are one or the other. I think you may asexual but even asexuals can enjoy sex they just don't want or need it or something like that. I'm demisexual, and I can have arousal and can enjoy masturbation but it is more blowing off steam than any thing "special" even when I have been with people I was much more into making sure they felt good than any real need for sexual release on my part. If that makes sense.

    My question to you is are you romantically attracted to anyone or have you in the past. No, 2D characters don't count. Could you see yourself being in a relationship with anyone even if it an imaginary or future someone?

    I think many of us at one time or another had a crush on 2D characters. If there weren't then there wouldn't be so many self-insert fanfictions or fan arts. I've been attracted to cartoon and anime characters myself.

    Although I'm out of touch with him I was pretty good friends with a guy on the spectrum that had a boyfriend. Both of them were really big into My Little Pony Friendship is Magic. The guy in question had the biggest crush on Braeburn and Big Mac from the show. He was a self proclaimed asexual but he did have relations with his boyfriend to make his boyfriend happy.

    That doesn't mean that people in relationships with people that are asexual have sex it is totally up to them to decide what they do in the context of the relationship. Some Asexuals like to be involved with the opposite sex and are heteroromantic. Others are
     
  8. Jitteringfeeling

    Jitteringfeeling Im confused

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    Okay that makes a lot of sense. Yes, I think I can be romantically involved whit man and woman as well as other genders so by this logic that makes me a Asexual Panromantic. I was more centred in the sexual part of this but I guess that's not the most important aspect of a relationship. Thanks for answering, you helped to clean up my mind.
     
  9. Teebs

    Teebs Lurker

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    Have you ever looked up Aegosexual?
    It's on the ace spectrum and essentially means a disconnect to sexual feelings. A lot of Aegos can look at a picture or video for example and feel attraction to that person or character. As long as they aren't directly involved (for example- they could see Ann actors and feel sexual attraction while watching them on a screen but feel nothing at all if they meet them.

    Judging by the 2d thing, Aegosexual is where my mind goes. You can feel sexual attraction- providing that the object of your desire has zero connection with you.
     
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  10. Jay Cgn
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    Jay Cgn Slytherin
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    Hello, I just wanted to add something that had nothing to do with your actual question itself, because that was answered, as I think, very appropriate.

    But you mentioned that your friends say that your standards are too high.

    DONT EVER BELIEVE THAT!
    You need to be aware of your worth, and lowering your standards, so you’re not lonely, is a major mistake!
    That’s how people get stuck in unhappy relationships. Because they’re scared to be alone.
    If someone doesn’t fit your standards, that’s okay! Don’t try to push yourself into some sort of thing you’re not happy with!
    Of course, people rarely fit 100% to somebody’s standards. And that’s fine. You’re going to find the person who fits it so good that you’ll fall for that person that much that you don’t care about their flaws. You’ll find the right person who’s worth it!

    Take care of yourself, know your worth.
    Xx
     

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