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How to know the difference between when someone is polite or romantically interested?

Discussion in 'Lesbian' started by Eddy360, Dec 4, 2019 at 7:15 AM.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Eddy360

    Eddy360 Amiable and fun to be with
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    It seems a bulk of people including myself fall under this category, especially when you live in a country that has stringent punishments regarding same-sex relationships, but even those in LGBT friendly countries still experience this.

    When we eventually find someone we like, we go through several heartaches pondering if the person likes me or is just being polite. Straight people keep giving us wrong signals all the time, from caressing of hands, to hugs, long stares and cuddling, all in the name of friendship.

    Now my question goes thus, "how can one detect and differentiate from when a person is being polite and nice and isn't romantically interested and when a person is into you?

    Cc.. Thespis AudryLeigh angel70 mike300 and other respectable members of this great community.
     
  2. Corvus
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    Corvus Agender chatterbox
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    I'm not straight but I'm "guilty" of all of these. That being said, since I know I am like this I am sure to mention my intent (or lack of) beforehand.

    If I say I'm only searching for friendship I mean it; then it's up to you what level of intimacy you're comfortable having with a friend. Basically whatever people tell me their intent is I tend to believe them. To me it's that simple since I have no head for games.
     
  3. mike300

    mike300 Active Veteran
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    Hi Eddy! my sweet girl, straight or bi , when someone is into u, the body lauguage , the way he/she is looking at u and speaks to u and the desire of being with u most of the time, are certain signals that this person wants u romantically ... a polite person greets u typically and leaves..a person that is attracted to u, greets u and stays... of course when this happens, u must show some response to encourage him/her...kisses
     
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  4. Eddy360

    Eddy360 Amiable and fun to be with
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    Nah I beg to differ, even with those "certain signals" in quote, when you drop the bomb on her, she may just back out, which is the case of most people. Even with all those signals, they'd still claim you are a friend and nothing more.
    --- Double Post Merged, Dec 4, 2019 at 11:34 AM ---
    Don't you think communicating your intent too early in a friendship may not allow the chemistry flow and it may jeopardize the friendship that is still at its early stages?
     
    #4 Eddy360, Dec 4, 2019 at 11:30 AM
    Last edited: Dec 4, 2019 at 11:34 AM
  5. Corvus
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    Corvus Agender chatterbox
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    Sure but I don't introduce myself with "Hi, I'm asexual so if I hug you a lot it doesn't mean I want to sleep with you" :p 
    There's a time for everything.
     
  6. AudryLeigh
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    AudryLeigh Proud tGirl
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    A straight person cuddling with a gay person in the name of friendship? I think not. Perhaps you are using an incorrect definition for "cuddle."
    cuddle:
    hold close in one's arms as a way of showing love or affection.


    Sincerely,
    Audry Leigh
     
  7. Eddy360

    Eddy360 Amiable and fun to be with
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    Yes it's very possible at least in my own case in the past and reading peoples experiences here, so yea straight and gay people do cuddle in scenario's like while watching a movie and when it's cold or just lying side by side flipping through stuff on the phone.
     

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