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genderfluid maybe lesbian in need of advice

Discussion in 'Lesbian' started by Mattie03, Jun 13, 2019.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Mattie03
    Cowboy

    Mattie03 Lurker

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    i'm having a sexuality crisis, i feel i am a lesbian except for one teeny tiny detail, i have been attracted to and dated 1 (one) boy before and i don't know if I can honestly say i'm lesbian after that, because even tho that was the one and only boy i've ever liked and before/after that it's only been girls. I dunno if i can call myself a lesbian because i don't want invalidate his gender, he's a trans boy, and fell in love with him when i thought he was a girl but after he told me, i still loved him, i dunno i'm super confused, and i don't wanna be transphobic bc i, myself, am genderfluid!! lesbians, please give me your wisdom, can I still call myself a lesbian if I had been attracted to one boy in my entire life?
     
  2. UniverseWoman

    UniverseWoman Lurker

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    Yes, no doubt about that. You can be lesbian, and have had one or a few rare times in your life where you felt attraction to these extremely few males, which most of the time, is because even though we are lesbians, being female makes us so emotion driven that we in very rare occasions can be attracted to males because to a emotionally bond.
    So, if its just extremely rare, and you at all other times in your life gets attracted to females then YES you are a lesbian.
    Btw: many lesbians and gays has had one or two "special" ones of the opposite gender in their lifetime that they did find attractive. Its just so few, or just one time, and almost always because of a special emotion from this person, that it does not change your sexuality. That you 99.99 of the time find girls attractive means that you are lesbian. :) 
     
  3. mike300

    mike300 Well-Known Contributor
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    yes u can still call yourself a lesbian
     
  4. Mattie03
    Cowboy

    Mattie03 Lurker

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    Thanks guys, this helped a bunch !!
     
  5. Anna V.

    Anna V. Greenhorn
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    I’m kinda similar. I technically identify as bi but I’ve only been with females and I can’t imagine myself feeling sexually attracted to guys but I do appreciate their looks. Seriously, my brain can’t even fathom what to do around them because I just get so confused. Honestly, just be yourself and identify how you want to identify. Nobody should be pressuring you and you are allowed to change how you identify over time if you feel like it. Whether it’s girls or boys or honestly nobody, you don’t have to explain your feelings about anyone to anyone using one word if you don’t want to. Don’t limit yourself, kid.
     

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