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Gay Friends and Straight Buds

Discussion in 'Gay' started by Mattyice, Sep 3, 2018.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Mattyice

    Mattyice Lurker

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    I'm a 27 y.o. male in NYC. I have only been out for the past 2 years. As such, I have been discovering my gay/sexual identity later in life. I have been doing okay as far as living my life and such. All my friends and family whom I came out to have been extremely supportive. Recently I began noticing that I am physically attracted to some of my straight male friends. I haven't really known what to do with this finding, but I have been sharing it with some of my close buddies. The other week, amidst several drinks, I told one of my straight guy friends that I was attracted to him. He's amazing and was totally fine with it, and just encouraged me to feel what I feel. Since then, I have become increasingly upset and frusturated by these feelings that are coming up and with the fact that I admitted this to my friend this in the first place. I feel guilty, like I shouldn't be attracted to friends/straight dudes. I also feel confused, as in what does that mean for our friendships? Can I still be friends with them? I want to be able to be open with my friends, just like when I came out. But I'm scared of freaking people out and losing these very important relationships in my life. Any advice and/or words of wisdom is greatly appreciated!!!!
     
  2. mask1985
    Woot

    mask1985 Shy bi guy
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    The bottom line is you're going to be attracted to straight/gay/bi guys without always knowing their sexual orientation. We've all been there I'm afraid. If you and the other guy reckon you can both live with knowing the situation that's great and the best outcome. But if you or he thinks it may make things awkward then it is better to distance yourselves from each other. Knowing your feelings will never be reciprocated is one of the hardest things to deal with but the only solution is to find someone else who feels the same way as you do.
     

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