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First time with a girl

Discussion in 'Lesbian' started by Skylar12, Jan 7, 2017.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Skylar12

    Skylar12 Lurker

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    Hi all

    Just wondering if anyone could help me out with this. I'm 22 years old and recently have just come out to most of my friends as a lesbian.

    The only embarrassing thing is that I've never been with anyone before, let alone a girl!

    Up until last year, every single person I've ever known has been straight, - and I've never wanted to be intimate with or even kiss a guy - even though I've had plenty of offers. I'm also very feminine so the few times I've been to a gay club, I'm never hit on by girls.

    Since I've now gotten a few more gay friends, they've offered to take me out. I really just want to be intimate with a girl, even someone I don't know - but I don't know how to get someone's attention at a club, since I'm shy as well. I also am really scared that I will have absolutely no idea what I'm doing. Are there girls out there that don't care about virgins? Or is that a complete turn off.

    Thanks! [​IMG]
     
  2. Flee

    Flee Lesbian

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    First off, kudos and congrats for coming out to your friends. That's a huge step.

    I cant speak for everyone but honestly, it shouldn't be a problem that youre a virgin. Just be comfortable in your own skin and the rest will follow through. Make it a point though to reciprocate, whatever that means. Im not entirely comfortable getting into specifics here haha but feel free to message me though I am no expert.

    Since youre fairly new to this "world", I suggest that you go easy on yourself. Go out there but dont be pressured to hook up right away. Keep on making friends (especially ones who accept you for who you are) and you'll be able to find someone (or that someone finds you) soon enough.

    Best of luck!
     
  3. angel70
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    angel70 The Old Guy
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    The best way for a shy person to meet others in the club scene is to go with a friend who is especially outgoing -- who will start conversations and draw you in, maybe even embarrass you a little for the sake of drawing the attention of others. It also helps to find a place where you're comfortable, and go regularly. If you become "a familiar face," people feel comfortable approaching you. Learn the names of the barmaids, and make sure they know yours. Tip!

    Once you're comfortable in the environment, meeting people is inevitable. Oh -- and some people totally enjoy showing a virgin "the ropes." Good luck!
     
  4. kanah
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    kanah Greenhorn

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    Be confident. A lot of the time people are hesitant to approach you because they see that you're a little uncomfortable and they don't want to make it worse.
     
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  5. TheAnswerGirl
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    TheAnswerGirl Stealthily stalking about
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    Let not your heart be troubled - everyone is a virgin at some point.

    To whom are you attracted? That is to ask, do you have a type? Butchies or femmes or ?? Perhaps you may want to consider a different club? I can assure you, we quality femmes are in high demand. Change your venue, change your luck? Me, I'm all about the person...I tend to favour femmes (like for like), but I've had my share of attraction to butchies. It's really the person for me. I admire wit, charm, and personality - typically the domain of femmes, but not exclusively.

    The harsh reality is there are plenty of girls who will take you up on this. Tell your mates you are on the prowl - believe me, the word will get around. You just have to own it. You could treat it like a clinical transaction...just tell her you have interest but no experience. Tell her you have the same bits so you feel like you have a pretty good idea about what to do. Ensure you find a girl who will respect your limits. Personally, I am not in favour of the clinical approach, though it may actually serve you well for your first experience.
     

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