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ever feel like your life is just a mess?

Discussion in 'Gay' started by polluxwest, May 23, 2018.  |  Print Topic

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  1. polluxwest

    polluxwest Greenhorn
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    I'm 18 years old studying in what is said to be the top notch course in my country. I am healthy. I have a family that likes me. And I have this huge iceberg of darkness and stress all over me.
    I see confident people in their future but I can't possibly be. I have no guarantee of job and no idea whatsoever of what the heck is supposed to make me happy.
    I thought it was medicine, then space, then physics. My friend influenced me into almost switching to pure maths. Now my boyfriend into becoming a pilot. I don't know what to do here, really. Its almost as if Im always in the wrong spot and constantly walking over thin ice. My head is a complete mess and im very impulsive. I want to go study to uk like crazy because of external influences, because my course is too theoretical. I don't do well with practice. I cant fit in anywhere. not worth mentioning how my body image makes me feel like a pile of trash.
    I very very fortunate to have befriended a boy who later became my lover. Now that same boy has to leave me to work. Indiference grows. Of all the shitty dudes in my course, this one that I cherished was the one to have to go. I can't study, I can't focus. He is a bad influence on me cause I cant stop missing him. Im missing out in every part of this. Too often I make jokes about falling down the tower, shooting myself, which I know arent really jokes, more like a reflection of how bad I am. I don't want not allow myself to do it, but going through this has become unbearable.
     
  2. angel70
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    angel70 The Old Guy
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    First, don't become a pilot -- pilots are just glorified bus drivers. If you develop your talent for maths, you'll have a very wide range of opportunities open to you. Some, like finance, can make you quite rich, and being rich relieves a lot of life's pressures. At 18, it's better to be a generalist than a specialist, because it keeps you open to more possibilities.

    I'm glad you've had a boyfriend, even if he had to go, because now you know you can love and be loved -- a very important quality. While teen relationships rarely last, they're a learning experience -- and you can remember them with pleasure when you're much older.
     
  3. liamthomas891
    Fine

    liamthomas891 Hivesark
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    That depends on the type of pilot. If you're an airline pilot, then yes, you're right. But if you're a jet/military pilot, then it's a whole different concept (except for the flying).
    --- Double Post Merged, May 27, 2018 ---
    That depends on the type of pilot. If you're an airline pilot, then yes, you're right. But if you're a jet/military pilot, then it's a whole different concept (except for the flying).
     

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