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Could I be nonbinary/genderfluid/???

Discussion in 'Agender/Non-Binary/Fluid' started by Belle55, Nov 7, 2019 at 2:08 PM.  |  Print Topic

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  1. Belle55

    Belle55 Lurker

    +1 / 0 / -0
    Hello everyone,

    I'm not sure if I'm right here, or if is okay to ask for advice regarding my gender identity. It might be a big block of text, but it's been troubling for me for some time and I'd love to hear your thoughts.

    I was born and raised female, and this is fine for me. I'm not dysphoric, I like my body/feel fine with the sex specific parts. I like dresses, high heels, nice makeup, all that female stuff. So I thought I had to be a cis woman.

    But lately, I'm not sure if I'm still 100% female. I have some male clothing I like to wear, because it's very comfortable and stylish in m opinion. Because of my short hair, I'm looking androgynous or even like a guy sometimes. There are guys looking more feminine than I do. And this doesn't bother me at all. I like presenting as and looking like a guy.

    Somedays I feel feminine, wearing makeup and highheels and dresses, and I like that. On other days I want to wear boy shirts and trousers and hope I'm looking strong, and you know, like a guy. Sometimes I'm even mis(?)gendered in public, and I realized it made me feel proud to be called "manly".

    On another day I had young children asking whether I was a girl or a boy, because they couldn't tell. I thought it felt pretty neat to be androgynous, too.

    But it all depends on my mood that day, I feel like I'm switching between feminine and masculine clothing, behaviour and so on. On some days I'm a bit of both.

    I really confused lately. Am I just a cis woman, who happens to like comfortable clothing? Or could I be non binary, gender fluid or something else between female and male?
    I'd love to hear your thoughts on this matter, and I'm thankful for any advice you can give me.
  2. Corvus

    Corvus Agender chatterbox
    Premium Supporter Beloved Member

    Oct 16, 2019
    +465 / 0 / -0
    Hi Belle and welcome to the family. First things first, it's ALWAYS ok to ask and you're definitely in the right place to find yourself.
    Expression is not identity so clothes alone might have nothing to do with gender and you wearing "boy clothes" might just be a fashion preference.

    Being happy with people not being able to tell if you're a man or a woman however, does veer into non-binary territory, since most binary people tend to take offence to people not stating their gender correctly. At that point you might be indeed genderfluid, but you also might be a lot of other things within the non-binary umbrella.

    Regardless, I think the biggest indicator for you not being a cis woman is the fact that you're questioning whether or not you're a cis woman ;) 

    Lastly I want to say that whatever label you decide to take for yourself is great and you will get nothing but love from us. We're here to help you in your journey.
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